Remembering Pepper (8/31/2004 - 8/25/2017)

Pepper - August 25, 2017

I'm so very sad to say that I had to let my little buddy, friend and companion, Pepper, go to The Rainbow Bridge on the day Hurricane Harvey made landfall, August 25, 2017.  A day I will never ever forget.  My heart is broken in two and so is Joe's, my husband, as well as our precious kitties, Miss Gali & Lucy.  Yes, they are mourning the loss of their dear friend.  I don't understand how some people can even think that animals don't have feelings and don't have emotions.  They definitely do!  I've always known this, but what I'm witnessing with my own eyes the proof that animals really do "FEEL".  

Miss Gali paces back and forth where Pepper's beds were under my computer table.  Then she sits at a distance and just stares in that spot.  How awfully SAD!   
Just yesterday, she laid on the side of the loveseat where Pepper used to lay next to me.  She NEVER EVER does this!!!!  OMG!  She's heart broken!  Poor thing!

Miss Gali laying in Pepper's 'spot' on the love seat next to me.
She misses her friend, Pepper, so very much!
 

Lucy smells and smells and then lays down in spots where Pepper once laid.  Just breaks my heart!  And Lucy has been sleeping in the scrap/computer room for hours on end, which is where Pepper always was because Pepper was with me.  Lucy NEVER did this before.  How sad.  :(

Two years ago, Pepper was diagnosed with a heart murmur.  If you don't know what that is....it is when the heart valves don't close completely after blood is pumped through, allowing a 'back wash' of blood to come back into the heart chamber.  Over time, this builds up and then the heart enlarges because it's having to pump 'overtime'.  Pepper's heart should have been 10 cm and was 13 cm. The vet couldn't believe how awfully fast her heart murmur progressed.  It was to a point that there was really no saving her.  Also, because her heart enlarged so dramatically, it pushed her esophagus to be at a parallel to her spine - it's supposed to be at a 45 degree angle downwards from the spine.  When I saw her x-rays I was just taken aback!

Back track:
For about 2 months or so, I noticed Pepper having more trouble running a long distance.  She always loved to run real fast to the end of our lawn, right by the road, to do her business and then she'd run at full speed back to us.  Panting like crazy, I just assumed she's getting older and is starting to slow down.  I used to tell her not to run.  Although she was over weight, an unhealthy beginning in life for her, she did lose some weight when she started living with us due to more activity and no table scraps!  She maintained her weight which is always better than gaining.

Then On Thursday, August 24th, I noticed she was breathing really quickly, but her happy and playful demeanor remained constant.  Next day, August 25th, same thing.  It was on my mind all day and I noticed she was a bit slower too.  Then she coughed - a sound I've never heard before.  I knew it was her heart.  I got ready & off we went to the vet.  

At the Vet:

Pepper's nerves got the best of her as we waited in the lobby to be seen.  She started coughing a LOT and then foam came out.  I stood up with her in my arms and demanded a vet immediately.  Pepper received an emergency injection of Lasix to help with the fluid retention.  Her little lungs were full of fluid & edema (swelling).  So the initial plan was to leave her with the vet so she could be monitored and then pick her up and bring her to the Emergency 24 Vet so that someone could watch her constantly.  Well, as soon as I arrived home my phone rang and it was the vet asking me to return quickly because Pepper had stopped breathing and had to be resuscitated!  OMG!  I rushed back to find little Pepper on a comfy mat on a stainless steel table breathing so quickly and had a tube down her throat for oxygen.  When she heard me say "Hi Sweetheart" her little eye turned to look at me.  Awwwwwwwww.  I felt her relief that I was there.  For that I am so very grateful....that she knew Lisa was there and she wasn't alone in that scary place with a tube down her throat.

After listening to the vet I just looked at her and said 'I think I need to let her go.  Don't you think that's the best thing?'  She told me if it was her dog, she would definitely put her to sleep.  I agreed and quickly signed a form and requested cremation.  I picked up Pepper's little head and held it in my hand and kissed her over & over again, telling her "You ole Haggidy.  Lisa loves you so so much.  I love you Pepper.  Now you get to go be with Mom & Pop."  The vet gave her the stop breathing injection and almost instantaneously she stopped breathing; then came the heart stopping injection.  The vet listened and told me she was gone.  I pinched Pepper's eyes closed and asked that the tube be removed so I could see her in a normal state.  I closed her little mouth and proceeded to just ball my eyes out.  Even the vet and the technicians cried.   I kept kissing her and telling her how much I loved her.  OMG!  The pain of losing a pet is, at least for me, much worse than losing a human being.